Rubbing Alcohol
by ichimatsuscat
Summary: Lately, Estonia has been feeling really tired of being ignored. Maybe a visit to Finland's place would help. Or vodka. Or both. Platonic EstFin.


Finland was a pretty big fan of sleep. It was one of the few times he felt at least a bit at peace with himself, not having to feel the constant hatred towards the world that he usually experienced in his waking hours. Like right now, as he slept peacefully in the shabby arm chair in his living room, having fallen asleep (which he had done in that chair many times before). While he seemed to always be interrupted whenever he tried to nap in this chair specifically, there was nothing tonight that could possibly stop Finland, his chest rising and sinking as barley audible snores escaped his lips. It was times like these where Finland was able to think that maybe-just maybe-this world wasn't nearly as bad as he always thought it was-

 _Ding-dong._

 **FuckthisworldIhopethesungoessupernovaandkills _everyone_.**

Finland let out a low, gutteral growl in annoyance as he forced his eyes open, eyebrows going in their default low, slightly knit-together position. Looking over at the door, he squeezed the handle of his knife (which was conveniently stabbed into the armrest of the chair he was sitting in), silently pondering for a few seconds whether being suddenly awoken was worth stabbing someone over. As he thought about it, he glanced over at the nearest window to see how late it was. To his surprise, it was rather dark- a bit late for someone to come to his place for any reason, that's for sure. Letting out a huff of breath, Finland reluctantly let go of the knife and decided to see who the hell needed to see him this late at night, hoping that it was pretty damn important.

"Hey, Finland!"

He looked at the visitor before him, slightly confused, before giving a small grunt in response. Standing at his doorstep was Estonia, with a bottle of vodka that, as usual, caught the Finn's attention rather quickly. But this was strange. She only brought vodka to try to get something out of him (usually to coax him into letting her join those Nordic parties that happened every once in a while). But there were no other Nordics here, and they definitely wouldn't be doing anything at this hour...

"I know this seems weird." She answered, as if reading his mind. "But I'm not here to bribe you with vodka or anything. Honest! I just thought we could spend some time together drinking, maybe? As friends, I mean."

Still slightly confused, Finland inspected her for any hints of lying. But, to his inspection, she did seem quite convincing. He noticed that the vodka was a different brand than she usual got for him, as if she just randomly took a bottle off the shelves, not really caring much about the quality. But there was also something about her eyes-she seemed tired and a little bit sad (at least, more than she usually looked), even though she still had that friendly, hopeful smile on her face as she waited for the other's response.

After a moment of contemplating, Finland fully opened the door, gesturing for Estonia to come inside. Despite having her moments of being a nuisance (especially when she pestered him about wanting to join the Nordics), she was actually pleasant company most of the time. While she was mostly a quiet girl, she also had an air of perseverance to her and a surprisingly dry, yet witty sense of humor that Finland couldn't help but like about her. Plus, they're history together made them relate to each other in a way the other Nordics and Baltics just couldn't dream of reaching. It wouldn't hurt to let her join him, right?

Estonia's smile widened slightly, giving a small "thank you" before entering. He didn't bother showing her around, as she had visited plenty of times before, and instead went into the kitchen to get two glasses for the vodka. After getting the glasses, Finland headed for his living room. Once there, he noticed that Estonia was already making herself at home, sitting at his couch and already opening the bottle of vodka.

Once again reunited with his chair, Finland set down a glass for Estonia on the coffee table before them, watching as she poured a rather generous amount of the intoxicant into her glass before handing the bottle back to him. As Finland poured his own glassfull, he watched out of the corner of his eye as Estonia began drinking almost immediately after handing him the bottle, not breaking contact with the glass until it was less than halfway empty. While he was definitely not one to worry about others, he found Estonia's odd behavior more than a bit concerning and decided it wouldn't hurt to keep a close eye on her. Just in case.

While the vodka Estonia had brought wasn't really to Finland's liking, it still brought a similar burning sensation to the Finn's throat that he found ironically comforting. Plus, he wasn't too picky; most vodka usually brought the same feeling to him, after all. For a while, the two just sat there as they drank silently in each others company, the only sound coming from minor movements, such as the creak of furniture as they readjusted their sitting positions, or the soft glugging of liquid when one of them refilled their glass. It wasn't abnormal for them to spend most of their time together like this. While Estonia was a bit more extroverted than her nothern neighbor, the two overall preferred to just silently enjoy each other's company, not feeling the need to talk about pointless things or invade into each other's personal lives like others seemed to do. Being in the other's presence was enough for them, and the rare times that one of them did more than that was awkward, to say the least.

During their silent drinking session, Finland did his best to make sure Estonia was doing okay, and not get too preoccupied by the booze. This proved to be easier for him than others, as he was one to hold his liquor surprisingly well. As he watched her out of the corner of his eye, he noticed how Estonia seemed more effected by the alcohol than she usually was, as her faced seemed a bit more readable. That tired and sad look in her eyes gradually became much more noticable than before, and it paired pretty nicely with how attached to her glass she seemed to be, as she seemed to down each refill quicker than before. Surprisingly, Finland actually had the urge to _speak up_ , wondering what the hell was up with Estonia tonight. Still watching the other, Finland internally negotiated with himself, trying to see if her strange mannerisms were worth opening his mouth over.

Once the vodka bottle was completely empty (mostly thanks to Estonia), Finland watched as Estonia relaxed on the other's couch, blankly staring at the wall in front of her, her expression even more troubled than before. At this point, the negotiation in Finland's mind turned into an outright brawl for dominance as he looked at her with his usual neutral expression. Just when he felt his jaw slightly loosen, his concern for his friend nearly winning, Finland closed it once he saw Estonia suddenly sighing before glancing at Finland.

"Hey, Finland..." She spoke up, her speach slow and ever-so-slightly slurred. "Don't you think it sucks for a nation to only be known for whoever previously ruled over them?"

Finland frowned, his eyebrows subtly knitting together in confusion. On one hand, it was quite strange to see Estonia trying to start a conversation with him, but he was also slightly relieved that he didn't have to be the one talking. He decided to stay silent until she continued speaking.

"It's just... it feels-I imagine it would feel like being in some sort of abusive relationship, and...and once you finally break up, everyone only knows you as 'that one person's ex' or something..." Estonia's brows furrowed a bit, as if she were a bit angered at her own words. "Or... if instead of being one of the Nordics, everyone just called you 'East Sweden'!"

That most definitely struck a nerve in Finland. His expression darkened, his hand subconsciously gripping onto the knife that was currently lodged into the arm rest of his chair. Estonia's eyes widened slightly as she realized what she had just said, and quickly shrunk into Finland's couch in fear, hoping that he wasn't too pissed off.

"I-I'm sorry!" Her voice wavered as she watched Finland threateningly point the knife in her direction. "I know that's a sensitive topic... I w-won't mention it again, I swear!" Estonia waited a moment before Finland decided to return his knife to his arm rest, though his expression remained foreboding. Estonia let out a breathe she didn't even know she was holding in before continuing.

"To be honest... being known as a Nordic country just seems so appealing. Barely anyone outside of Europe knows who the hell the Baltics are, and... we aren't really as close as you guys seem to be. I-it would be great if I could just be something other than 'Russia's chew toy,' or 'that ex-Soviet state,' or..." Her speech became a bit more slurred as her emotions overtook her for a moment, but she stopped herself before things got out of hand. After taking a deep breath, Estonia forced a small smile, as if she hadn't just opened up her own personal bottle of anger at the world in front of her friend.

"I'm sorry, Finland." She said, suddenly getting up and heading for the door. "I know how uncomfortable having a conversation like this must be for you, especially at this hour. I...I should go."

Just as her hand touched the doorknob, Estonia suddenly felt a firm hand grab her shoulder and spin her around. To her surprise, Finland pointed back to the living room, a stern look on his face that would not take 'no' for an answer. With the condition Estonia was in, both physically and emotionally, it didn't seem to be the best idea to let her walk all the way home alone at this time of night. The two had a silent staring contest that lasted for at least a minute, before Estonia gave in.

"...I guess you're right." She sighed, making her way to the living room. "It wouldn't hurt to spend the night, I suppose."

Once Estonia was back at the couch and Finland was certain she would stay there, Finland took the now empty glasses and vodka bottle and returned to the kitchen. After the glasses were taken to the sink and the bottle was in the trash, Finland retrieved a taller glass from his cupboard and filled it with water. With a small smile, Estonia accepted the water, downing it a bit slower and more careful than she had with the vodka.

It didn't take long for the drowsiness to kick in for Estonia, a soft yawn escaping her mouth as she slowly fell onto her side on the couch. Noticing this, Finland made his way to his bedroom, returning with an extra blanket for the other. Carefully, he layed the blanket on top of Estonia, trying his best to not disturb her. However, just as he was about to walk away from her, he heard her voice, slightly muffled through one of the pillows on the couch.

"Thank you, Finland."

After a moment of silence, the corners of Finland's mouth slightly twitched upwards in what was his equivalent of a smile, giving a small grunt in response before shutting off the lights and making his way to his own bedroom. As he got himself ready for bed, he considered the idea of inviting her to his sauna in the morning. It would definitely be a better place to discuss anything else that might have been on Estonia's mind, and he would be better able to give his own two cents on the subject. Plus, from what he saw, it looked like Estonia _really_ needed to relax...

* * *

 **This took forever to finish, but I'm finally done! For some reason, it was just so difficult for me to figure out how I wanted this thing to flow (especially at the beginning). I may or may not do a sequel/second chapter about them spending time in Finland's sauna, depending on how well received this story is. I'll try to get out more stories if I ever decide to get off my lazy butt! Until then, I hope you enjoyed this story!**


End file.
